Bidden in de sauna

Soms wanneer ik een lage weerstand heb, dan ga ik naar de sauna. Sauna Ridderrode. Alleen. Zoals vanavond. Dan ga ik eerst in de hete citroensauna, vervolgens een minuut onder water in het koude dompelbad en tot slot in het zwembad. Daar in een hoek van het zwembad kun je een waterstraal starten d.m.v. het indrukken van een grote zwarte knop. En bij die waterstraal zit een grote gele lamp met daaromheen een grote ijzeren ring waar je je stevig aan vast kunt houden. En daar ga ik naartoe om te bidden. Ooit heb ik bij toeval ontdekt dat door de waterstraal tegen de buik en de speling van het licht van de lamp er een magisch spel van vonken en vlammen kan ontstaan in de schittering van het water. Kan ontstaan, want het is een heel specifiek gebeuren. Ik moet iets naar voor of juist naar achter leunen. Naar links of rechts. Wat in- of uitademen. En dan kan het ineens gebeuren dat ik het zie: puur vlammende lichtgele energie met blauwe vlammen erdoor. Pure energie. Dansend. Ik kan het niet goed verklaren, maar voor mij is dat net alsof ik God aankijk. Gehypnotiseerd staar ik dan zo’n vijf minuten in die heilige vlammen. Totdat het ineens voorbij is. Silte… Langzaam kom ik uit mijn tranche en besef ik weer waar ik ben. En met een weemoedige glimlach denk ik: no more shall we part. En ga ik door met de volgende saunaronde.

Losing the stars

About that other link with nature that we have lost: the stars.

We are all aware of the dire state of Mother Earth, but many people (including myself) seem to overlook that we also have lost our connection with that other divine source of inspiration: the stars.

At my high school, during the social development class there was a subject, which I did not understood at the time. I even thought it was stupid! It was about horizon pollution. At the time I thought that it was not relevant at all. If you are no longer able to see the fields, because buildings have been erected, this is just a signal of human evolution, right? Why would it be an issue when it does not get dark at night? I failed to see that we would then no longer be able to see the stars.

A couple of years ago, I was in the middle of nowhere in a Spanish town called Olmedo and I was struck to the core when I saw the clear night sky. Without any aid whatsoever, just with my naked eye, I was able to distinguish, thousands and thousands of stars. Not that I was able to identify them, though….

And now I have started reading a book called ‘Homer’s Secret Iliad’. It is about how Homer integrated the knowledge of the Greek people about the stars inside the Iliad. Not as just some deeper layer in the book. It is the other way around. Homer wrote the Iliad in order to pass on the sacred knowledge of the stars for the posterity. At the time there was no printing yet, but it was considered imperative that the star knowledge was shared amongst the ordinary people as well. With Homers’ Iliad the Greek star knowledge could be shared by minstrels to a much greater group of people.

Because every man and woman is a star.

Integrating the sacred and the profane

As above, so below. As sacred, so profane.
Sacrifice means to make sacred. This does not mean that you no longer can do certain things, but it means that the intention in which you do certain things changes. The challenge is to integrate the profane inside you with the sacred inside you. For example, you still can eat a burger at McDonalds. But if you pray before eating the burger, it becomes a lot more meaningful experience. As a result of making the profane sacred your behavior might change. So instead of eating a burger at McDonalds you might decide to start eating bio burgers. But in the process of sacrificing it is important to include all aspects of you as they are: your senses, feelings and thoughts. Only by seeing and accepting who you truly are, you can start the process of making yourself sacred. Next, you would investigate what aspects are integral parts of yourself and you will start by honoring them. Sexuality, for example, is then no longer a something profane (a sin or something dirty). Instead your sexuality becomes something sacred by making love or even praying (tantra). Only when your above is aligned with your below, then sacredness within yourself is achieved.

De herrijzenis van de masochrist

De herrijzenis van de masochrist.
Ecstatic Dance met Pasen stond voor mij in het teken van wedergeboorte. Door middel van ecstatische dans, heb ik het ego laten sterven om vervolgens te ontdekken dat de ziel dan op staat. Dat lijkt masochisme, maar het is masochristisch. Dat is de Passie. Jezelf doelbewust aan het kruis nagelen en jezelf opofferen voor iets groters. Dus gooi alles eruit wat je in je hebt en ontdek dan dan je een oneindige bron van liefde blijkt te zijn. Offer jezelf op als druppel en ontdek dat je de zee bent. Het offer is fysiek zijn, maar Jezus is ook niet voor niets fysiek gestorven. Maar wees niet bang: je sterft, maar je zult nog mooier herrijzen.

Lou Reed tragic transformation

Listening to Lou Reed’s transformer. This album my brother listened to when I was around 14 years old. Then it had this tough explicit feel. The picture with Lou in leather with something huge bulging in his pants…. Yesterday I have been listening to this album again and I think that now I have understood what the Transformer in this album really is: New York or any other big city for that matter. A city which lures you in with prospects of a better life, new technologies, but also Freedom with a capital F. This city transforms ordinary town folks into the most outrageous colorful people (as described in Walk on the wild side). This gives the album something cool, powerful and funny. But on the other side there is a much more serious, yes, an even depressed undertone. This becomes clear in Perfect Day where the singer sings that mysterious phrase ‘you made me forget myself’. Another example is the New York telephone conversation which starts with New York gossip, but ends with a clear call for love. The album ends with Goodnight ladies. A late night at a club. Nowhere left to go. Loneliness. What is left to do? Then better get high… I was not even born in 1972, but I feel that this album gives a good reflection of the impact that a city like New York had on people then. With its massive freedoms in all directions and as a consequence people getting lost. People who have become the most beautiful and outrageous butterflies, but still long to be loved.

(produced by David Bowie by the way)